Wedding Gift Do's & Dont's

The engaged couple have distributed their gift registries. Now you have only to decide which lovely items to buy and wrap. But in this economy, do you really have to pony up gift after gift for wedding after wedding?
No one wants to look cheap or rude. Here are some rules to follow when it comes to wedding gift giving:
1. The Bridal Shower. This is a gift-giving occasion, so don't go without one. When you're invited to several showers, it's OK to give at only one; the gift's cost should be less, perhaps one-third, of what you will spend for the wedding present. Bring the gift to the shower. And no, buying a nice shower gift does not let you off the hook for a wedding present.
2. The Engagement Party. Generally, gifts are optional, but expectations vary by region, so ask the host to be sure. On the invitations, many couples say "No gift preferred" 0r "Your presence is your present." If you give, it can be a small or token gift. When in doubt, bring a bottle of champagne or sparkling cider, or perhaps a pair of toasting flutes. If you do not attend the engagement party or shower, you do not need to send a gift.
3. The Wedding. If you're invited to the ceremony, send a gift even if you do not attend. If you are invited to the reception only, you do not have to give a gift. In deciding how much to spend, consider two things: your budget and your relationship to the couple. Send the gift in advance to avoid it being misplaced at the wedding.
4. Destination Weddings. Even if you have paid to travel to a far-off destination, you are obligated to give a gift- but a token gift is an option.